Hmm…

I really want to write a Science Fiction short story. I guess I’ll try. Two reviews coming up today.

Yahtzee Wins!

As any logical person knows, the entire Smash Brothers series is a load of fermented horse shit, and Yahtzee shoves it down the throat of the idiots who don’t.
“But I need my regurgitated, shitty Nintendo franchises!” they say while ignoring not shitty games like Zak and Wiki.

My favorite OST’s

I listen to a lot of OST’s. It increases my appreciation for the movie AND the music that much more.
For those of you who don’t know what an OST is, it stands for Original Soundtrack, and it’s essentially… well, the movie soundtrack.
Onto the list!

- Pulp Fiction OST
- Office Space OST
- Rocky Horror /Picture Show 4 disc set
- Hot Fuzz OST
So, anyway, I recommend checking those out, and give me any of your recommendations!

Game Review: Syndicate

I was shouting with fucking excitement when I heard about the premise of Syndicate. It takes the family friendly, wholesome activities such as “pop a cap in dat niggas ass”, “light up a blunt, g” and “sell a blunt, g” into an online game. (actually, its mobster style, not gangster style) It’s akin to Drug Wars, Drug Lord, or any classic drug-based trading game. I’m sure it could be renamed to make it more appropriate, but then it wouldn’t be MANLY, right? Right??

As seen above, the gameplay revolves around buying life destroying drugs, like heroin and cocaine (not canabis!).
AMERICA, FUCK YEAH
The game could be really, really fun. But the bugs fuck it up. And some of the players are assholes. Overall it’s a fun game. Time for a narrative.

The year is 1993. Enter Vito Abruzi, medium ranking member of the Hickey family. After finishing a long day of buying and selling heroin in the constantly shifting drug market, he goes to waste some money playing blackjack, only to find his mortal enemy there.
The two stand there, watching, waiting.
Shots go off.
He barely escaped with his life.
Vito has come out alive- for now.
He calls up Earl Hickey, the don of the family, for protection.
The tension rises… What will happen? ANYTHING INTERESTING? WHO KNOWS.

So, good points, great concept, nice atmosphere, sort of fun to play. Bad points? Buggy as shit, and not much to do at the moment. Chris updates it often though.
Until the next version comes out: 3 Crackwhores out of 5

Atheism Is Alive

I’ve been trying to stop going off on tangents on random shit, but damn are some people stupid.

I don’t really need to say whats so ironic about that post (or the blog’s name for that matter). So I won’t.

Attention, Internet

Keep /b/ to /b/. Thanks.

All the political candidates suck

Election time ‘08 and as usual all the candidates are fucking morons. Who’s going to be the next Bush?

McCain: Money greedy dumbshit
Huckabee: Delusional fundamentalist Christian even more batshit insane than your average evangelo-maniac
Hilary: Over confident idiot
Obama: Doesn’t know shit (will win the election mainly because of race and the average white’s commitment to being politically correct)
Ron Paul: I don’t know where to begin…
First of all, his fans are annoying as fuck. Stop badgering me about your dumbass candidate.
Second, he’s an overbearing Christian. Second, he makes ridiculous claims that would be impossible to hold through on. The president isn’t the fucking dictator or king, after all, theres this little thing called “Checks and Balances” (despite the fact that it doesn’t work for shit. Third, theres no chance he would win.

Don’t even get me fucking started on the (dropped out) Bill Richardson…

Resident Evil Racist, Common Sense still Missing

Everyone needs to read this.
I could write a whole bitch fit about it right here, but he sums it up pretty well for me.
Gamers being hypocrites once again.

I Love Demonoid

2 days ago while logging onto MSN Messenger for the first time in months, I was informed Demonoid was back up.
Now I love Demonoid, I have donated and I have a Demonoid T-Shirt. I was pretty fucking ecstatic, to say the least.
Whats so great about Demonoid? Well, the design is excellent, and the community is good, yes. But the torrents are where its at: The wide range of torrents like at The Pirate Bay, yet good quality torrents like at a private tracker.
“Criminals” everywhere are celebrating by breaking copyright laws and having a damn good time doing it.

Unrotic: Battle Raper

Hello and welcome to the first post of the first feature on Dr Cliche, Unrotic. We will look at various weird hentai or eroge games and laugh at them. Haha.
The well known Illusion, a “ZANY” Japanese game company famous for it’s Eroge and Hentai games, has a series, “Battle Raper“, that is quite a tangent from their usual works, and, indeed, the works of most hentai game developers.
Today, we will be focusing on the first game in the Battle Raper series… Battle Raper. The premise of the game is fairly simple: It’s a generic fighting game, but you fight the girls to strip them and rape them, not to win a mystic sword or to defeat Sub-Zero.

The gameplay is essentially like any generic fighter, but worse: You have your two attacks buttons, your pseudo-3D movement, and random special-combo moves that are impossible to remember or perform. LEFT RIGHT UP DOWN Z X DOWN X C LEFT C C C. Yeah, I’m going to remember that in the middle of a battle.
The further you progress in fighting them, the more of their clothes you rip, which interrupts gameplay and is quite annoying. Another interruption that randomly happens is you perform a special move in which you either fondle them or force them to blow you. Awkward, yes, but the gameplay is so horrible, its actually a welcome break.
In between fighting you have to scroll through long, Japanese text seqences with no fast forward button. Occasionally you will come to an H-scene which have even worse controls than the fighting, and are ridiculously un-erotic. The low polygon count will keep you flaccid for days.
Seriously, this game is worth a laugh or two, but don’t get it for the gameplay (lol) or for wanking. Besides, controls need two hands anyway.